We are the Famous Five (West Highland Way)

Some of the lads were a bit soft (Cormac and Vic) and gave this one a miss citing the usual pathetic excuses. Nothing new there to honest. Mike, Pa and Frank however decided it wouldn't be right not to hike, given we were sleeping in its shadow. Off we went at 610 on Sunday morning after mass and getting a taxi to starting point. All bitterly blaming Mike for his keenness when if he had shown any reluctance we would have bailed also and slept in. Anyway, tough old hike, took us 5 hours 30 mins to scale the 1345 metre old lady. We unfortunately witness the aftermath of an accident on the way down  that resulted in a lifeless body being winched up by a rescue helicopter in front of us so that was all a bit sobering. Most of the thousand people on the mountain were oblivious to this situation of course. Twas like Central Station coming down though.        

[ Firstly, my friends, it is not surprising, though again, disappointing,  that the Boston resident should engage in some Alternative Facting. Still, it isn't his fault, that's what the movie business will do to you. See below for an honest assessment of the last day].  And so it came to pass, last day walking, free of all the stresses and strains of the real World, a group of lads enjoying the fresh air and each other's company. Or not, as it so happened. After Victor's heroics yesterday we knew that Pa had a point to prove. Especially after spending a night in a dog kennel with three others. The Engineer meanwhile luxuriated in a family room with a tv and two spare beds. Course he kept well quiet about this. There was no 'ah come on lads, I'll see you right, share with me". In fact he left dog biscuits outside the door just because he thinks he's funny. He was barking up the wrong tree on that score and we vowed to put some manners on him at t...

So it had to happen. Frank has cracked. Two nights in a row in a sweat box and he is broken.  He has disavowed blog duties and appears sullen. Pa stepped in and saved the blogging day. The last leg was doomed from the get go. No one slept well except for Cormac whose accomodations were top of the line two star. No sleep, no esprit du corps, no energy to rally and treat each other with any semblance of decorum. Clearly a leadership vacuum. And our supposed leader Cormac was lounging solo in a 3 bedroom with all the mod cons. Off we went. Burdened with lingering resentments, it was angry hiking. Not a happy ending in sight. There had been talk of a 3 day party to celebrate our achievements on the trail. Not a feckin' chance. Pa tried to rally everyone with a well rehearsed Patton speech but it was of little use. Mike smiled nervously. Vic's vision of a harmonious drum circle was in tatters.  We rolled into Fort William at disjointed times, not a pair of us to cross the lin...

Super walk today over the mountain and into the town. Pa and Mike walked with me - normally I was forced to walk alone - so few photos of them below. Vic put manners on us all and waltzed into town thirty minutes before the rest. I promised I wouldn't mention the fish and chip shop incident with Cormac. So I won't. Let's just say chicken nuggets probably wasn't the way to go.... This is our accommodation tonight. Four of us in this shed. I'm not blaming Vic for this but needless to say things are tense in the camp. Cormac is laughing of course as he has a room up town.

We met Mary from Kilfenora on route and I think it's fair to say that Frank made an instant impression. It was clear that she was immediately attracted. What was also clear was that the other lads didn't like it. None of Mike's gags went down well and as for Cormac's jokes and interesting anecdotes, well, the less said the better. Pa and Vic remained curiously aloof although Pa was distracted by allowing the two Israeli's to shower in his room and whether they would rob him blind or not. And then kill him.  Anyway Mary went on her way, though looking back at Frank all the while, in a pining, longing kind of way. And the lads settled in for a few leisurely pints over food to watch Man Utd v Ajax. And then the bombshell from Cormac. He said to Frank the following:  "You are hearing the ladies Frank, but you are not listening.  And you look at them but you don't see them" . Frank went for him immediately and got a good few blows in before Benn...

It was hot and it was sticky.  A member of our party (who shall remain nameless) got sick on an orange but we think that perhaps it was something to do with the night before. Sorry for all the Pa shots, he was very insistent that he be the focus of this post.       

An interesting day after all the coups in the past few days. Cormac has slipped easily into his leadership role as the big man, ruling with an iron grip. What he did to Vic over the spilling the wine incident was truly shocking, as well as sending a very strong message. Deliverance comes to all who deserve it I suppose.  Of course, the usual infighting continues unabated under the superficiality of all being good in the camp.  Firstly, the organizational abilities of the group remain pathetic. After much discussion last night no one knew what was agreed for the morning. After multiple texts still no one knew who was doing what with whom. Look, I'm the last one to point the finger but Mike really is dragging us all down. Not to put too fine a point on it, but there really is too much lubing. Which is fine but why involve the rest of us?  And then there was the incident with the cops, and you've guessed it, Mike again. In fairness, sheep worrying is hard to prove but he cou...

In other news, not surprisingly, the Philosopher's reign didn't last long. Maybe 7 hours. They say that when two Irishmen meet on a street one always wins. And so it has come to pass. What happened was as follows:  Pa was having his breakfast at the corner table ( wallowing no doubt in overthrowing Frank the night before) while his lessers shared a table in the centre of the room. Next thing Galvin stood up and approached his table flanked by henchmen Bennett and Levashoff ( who had a ski pole, not menacing but you knew it was there at the same time, like). Cormac looked at the Philosopher, and then he nodded at the door, and then he waited. Pa just got up and walked out. No words were spoken. Hopefully he'll have a safe trip back home. He was harmless enough to be fair.  I mean, look, Cormac was playing senior hurling and Pa was playing minor, just about, it was never going to work.  Some Boston dwelling hippy-dippy movie guy coming over to Scotland and telling bunch of ...

Hats off to us today after a brutal days walking, fierce tough underfoot. I'd say 9-10 hours walking to cover 20 miles, mad. Whatever about Vic and Frank (who have done a few of these walk), for Mike, Pa and Cormac to come through with only the odd sobbing incident is fierce impressive. I am truly in awe of these guys though it kills me to say it.  These pictures don't do justice to how rough it was - more like Nepal than Scotland - but ever since the incident the lads refuse to share any photos with Frank.       

 

The King is dead, long live the King! The unthinkable has happened, but more of that anon. The day started off fine with some nice hills - see shots below and everyone was happy. For a change.  There was also some panic as we came across the sign below and Vic was interrogated as to why we were here and not in Scotland.  Next thing though Frank went over on his ankle and everything changed. And changed forever. Initially Pa and Cormac were very supportive of Frank talking to him and shortening the road and getting sticks etc but soon they fell into deep conversation with the lads behind. Then it came. Pa was the designated axe man.  "Frank, in light of your recent injury, and given that with you the lid is only half shut - another way of saying Frank is a few pence short of a shilling- we have decided that it would be better if you took a back seat from now on", and then he gave me a bus ticket to Crianlarich! But it wasn't a bus ticket at all. It was s pie...

Got a bit wet but nothing too serious. Mike was the unexpected star of the show by not departing after 4 hours and romping home. Of course Cormac and Pa made a race out of it and were getting mani-peds by the time we all arrived in. They are just so tough those lads!  On the team front things got a little bit tense. Cormac came to Frank and asked 'what are we going to do about Vic, he's gone power crazy?' and it was hard to disagree. Just because he sent out a spreadsheet and made a few phone calls the guy thinks he is in charge.  Ironically, later in the day,  Vic went to Frank and said 'what are we going to do about Cormac, he thinks he owns the place?" and it was was hard to disagree. Frank diffused the Vic situation by giving him some more haggis.    He kept wanting to kick Pa and Mike out of the group because they were obviously the weakest link and because  their strange attachment to chiseled backpackers and canines.    Anyway, let's hope e...

Why Elvis threw it all away, nobody knows why Ruby had to die.  Nobody knows why Mike decided to walk........ I hadn't intended to blog about Glasgow but after the sensory overload of NEDS (Non Educated Delinquents), Huns (derogatory term for Rangers fans) and STDs (talk to one of the American based walkers) I felt it would be remiss not to record the events of the first day. All bar Cormac converged at the hotel circa 2.30pm whereupon Pa's hair (and that George Clooney coif) quickly became the foremost topic. I mean, seriously. The duck of shame was immediately passed to him.    And when Pa started on the usual guff about it not being about the destination, but instead the journey that's when we realized we were in big trouble. His bleatings about Glasgow being the hotbed of Scottish music also wore thin after the first 15 bands. Something would have to be done. We remain confident that Cormac will put manners on him eventually - perhaps a good beating? We wa...

Just to get it out of the way, Timmy has been put into a kennel and has not, as various commentators have opined, been slaughtered, sold into the sex trade or indeed been disguised as a Shinty stick. Forget Timmy.  The walk is 96 miles and the cast of characters is as follows: Cormac -  A pillar of society, a good family man whose hurling exploits have allegedly surpassed junior hurling. His words. Lives in Youghal.  Frank - The selfless servant of all that is good and true and pure. Lives in Cork. A legend in his own mind.  Mike -  A slave to the World of Mike and an aficionado of all that is weird and wonderful. One of the most reliable people ever. Lives in London, from Youghal originally. Pa  - An 'expert' in French cinema and a photographer of insects; you get the picture. Lives in Boston, from Youghal but you wouldn't know with that fella. Vic  - The brains behind the whole operation. A Yank from SF. Best walker ever, and that's ...